60 Days of Little Introspection, Day 12: Are You “Out” as an Adult Little to Friends and Family?
Good Afternoon Friends!
Today’s post is a more personal one so bear with me here. Today I’d like to share with you my journey as an adult little and how I “came out” to my friends and family members. First off, I want to state that to any little who feels like they are unable to come out to their family members– I get it. Our lifestyle isn’t widely understood (yet) by people not into BDSM, and it can be especially confusing to parents. My story is no exception despite coming out to everyone.
In truth I had no grand plans to come out to my parents. As a child of divorce my small family scattered to all 4 corners of the U.S. after my parents split and I have been living on my own since I was 18 years old. But as I began writing a Cg/l blog and publishing activity books for Littles, I saw a career beginning to blossom for myself. I felt proud about the content my husband and I created and I wanted to share that with my family. So, one day I decided to take the leap and tell my parents. First up was my mother. Now, I should pause here and paint you a picture of what my mother is like. My mother was an educator for almost 30 years. Having multiple degrees in the field of education she prides herself in being able to understand people and patterns of behavior. And while she was swept up in the hippie movement of the 60’s, she also was raised by conservative, Southern parents and so at her core she is more traditional.
“Mom” I said politely sitting across from her on the couch, “I want to tell you this thing I’m a part of”. My mom smiled with interest and tilted her blonde head. “I’m a part of this group within BDSM” I began. My mother’s smile slowly faded and I saw visions of “50 Shades of Gray” flash before her eyes. You see, my mother and I never had the “birds and the bees” talk when I was young. Sex was not something that was ever spoken about in our family. So to hear that her child ended up living and being a part of the adult little movement was akin to a grenade going off in her mind. “It’s not bondage or whips though!” I blurted out quickly seeing her blush. Yeah, that statement didn’t help either. “I don’t understand,” she said slowly. “So, there’s this thing called an adult little” I began. She nodded. Okay, the first baby step is complete, I thought. I went on to explain what regression actually is, and why this is a part of my soul. Her green eyes flashed confusion and a hint of frustration. “But, you’re an adult,” she said at last. I sighed and nodded patiently.
For the next half hour we went back and forth as I explained things to her and answered her questions. No, I was not going to mess up my child by being an adult little (as I know how to separate my role as a parent and when to regress into little space). No, I do not go to the bathroom in my diapers (although there are some who do and that’s perfectly okay!). Yes, I do call my husband Daddy, but that name is not the same as the sexualized “daddy” term we hear in social media. And yes, despite being the child of a hippie-feminist, I am a submissive who engages consensually in a power exchange relationship with my husband.
I came out to my mom as an adult little, and she practically wanted to shove me right back in the closet. I’m sitting here smirking as I type this blog post because I think sometimes certain topics are just too tricky for older generations to understand. And you know what? That’s okay.
Coming out to friends was far easier than family members. For me, I chose to come out to friends that I had been hanging out with on Discord. We all shared the same server and hung out online on a daily basis. Each one of us was a member in the D/s lifestyle, but we practiced in very different ways. One of us was an adult baby. Another was in a Master/slave relationship with her husband. Another was a babyfur to her Owner-fiance, and then there was me… just a non-binary Little who is happily married to my Daddy/hubby. They were supportive of me being a Little, and that made me feel accepted. But I know that as I meet more people in the future it might not always be like that. So, it’s important that we always remember to choose carefully when and with whom we come out to. Never put yourself in a dangerous situation and always trust your gut instinct. The world can be tough to navigate, but here in this space at the Little Space League you will ALWAYs be accepted!
Alright my friends, that’s it from me for the post. If you liked it, comment and let me know! I’d love to hear from you. Enter your email below to sign up for regular posts to your inbox and I will see you right back here tomorrow for the next topic!